Saturday, December 19, 2015

It occurred to me this morning that in just four days, I will be heading home. That means that in six days it will be Christmas, followed by a lazy boxing day, followed by the most dreaded drunken night of the holidays: New years eve.

More accurately, I dread the relentless unrealistic expectations. The human condition otherwise known as new year's resolutions. It's the cherry on the fucking cake.

Every year, without fail, some time after Christmas it begins. Sometimes it even continues into late January. The endless tirade of bullshit clogs every conversation and every social media platform we partake in. It's usually something along the lines of "I'm gonna loose 50kg this year" or "I'm going to save ten grand" or "I'm going to save the planet" or "I'm going to fix my relationship with my mother". Tirades of endless unrealistic pig fodder.

Call me cynical or pessimistic, call me what you will. You know I'm right. Your diet will end at precisely 3am in the morning on the 1st of January 2016 when, as you stumble home, you spot a gas station. Whether it be a mince and cheese pie or a block of chocolate, resolutions never stick. The reality is we aim too high. We are after all, a fickle race, an uncontrollable force of nature. We thrive on cheap fast food and bad television and one night stands. If you're gonna try and change your life, you're going to have to start off a lot smaller than "I'm gonna fix global warming".

Of course I'm no better. I'm not pulling this blogpost out of my butt, I've tried and failed many times to stick to resolutions. Unfortunately for me, I not only thrive on cheap tricks, but also the saying "fuck it". If I want a pie, I'll eat one, and if I wanna binge on reality television in my skuds all day, I'll bloody well do it. No shame.

This year, I've decided to make resolutions that I'll stick too. Small realistic goals that I'll slowly achieve throughout the year without feeling guilty when I slip up. After all, we're all human. Mistakes are what help us learn and evolve, so resolutions in a way actually help us grow even when they don't work out. There you go, I said something positive.

So without further ado, here are my resolutions for 2016.

1. Be healthy and happy.
I think I've written this in just about every blogpost I've written so far, because it's so bloody important. Too often when we're making health related decisions, we aim to loose weight. We tell ourselves, "I will get up at 6am every day before work and go for a 40 minute run followed by yoga and oatmeal for breakfast". For some, this kind of regime works. For the other 98% of us who lack self-control, this resolution just makes us feel guilty. Some days, you need a sleep in followed by pancakes. Some days you need a run. Because we're human. If you're happy, confidence in yourself and your body will follow. Fall in love with yourself.

And by radiating confidence you will...

2. Meet people and make friends (but don't feel guilty staying in on a Saturday night).
Socialising is fun, but so is finishing season three of Orange is the New Black. Find a balance. Do what you feel like doing. No pressure.

3. Appreciate your loved ones.
About a week ago I wrote a post entitled "Loneliness and Life's Meaning". When I wrote that, I was in a bad place. I had been to a doctor and she wanted to put me on anti-depressants.

I've always opposed being on medication, no matter how much my anxiety or mood worsens. I didn't know what to do, I felt like I had nobody. Later that week, I was drinking with my flatmate and an old friend of hers. We talked till about 3am and I felt so much better about well, everything. The next day I talked to my Mum, then I talked to another friend who is also going through a hard time. And just like that, a week after I felt like I could throw myself in front of a bus and no one would care, I feel appreciated and safe. Never underestimate the power of love (bloody hell that sounds corny). Love and appreciate your family and friends, take care of yourself as well. Everything is going to be a-okay.

4. Travel.
This is one of my long-term goals. Whether it be at the end of next year when I finish uni, or the end of 2017, I will make it happen. I've already saved enough money for the airfares, I just need a bit more. Your goal doesn't necessarily have to get you to South America or Europe. You could aim to just get out of town. Again, no pressure. Travelling, or moving around, is good for the soul. Enrich your life, experience different cultures, try different food. Live and love and go places.

5. Finish something.
This is a more personal resolution just for me, as I found out just yesterday that I had gotten into honours year at university. I almost cried with relief, as I was so sure that I had bombed. Now my main goal for next year is to graduate. Yours can be something else. Finish a painting, finish doing up the house. Learn how to change a tyre, or perfect winged eyeliner. Tell someone you love them, learn how to sew. Adopt a puppy, or go visit your oma in her rest home.

In the end, whether it be big or small, do something that makes you happy, successful and accomplished. After all sweet pea, we are all human.

Until next time babes, stay strong x

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